From the nights you had me up
To the many times you made my heart race,
Second by second,
Beat by beat,
You had me at one realization
I couldn’t keep you anymore
You were the excuse i used
When no one else knew
When no one thought it was true
As a growing student
Heavily burdened by you
I always saw the whole actuality
I never saw
Why you chose me
And you had me disputed
Always in dispute Photo by Ian
From you
Only you
You requested my hurt
I gave it all to you
Because I was self doubted
Just for comfort
I kept up emotions
I pursued for strength
Although it was out of reach
I struggled to endure because of YOU
You became my natural aptitude
When a baby stands it begins
to walk
When a body is exhausted it
Is determined to rest
You bestowed a 12 year old girl
apprehension to unknown fear
Her discovery of contemporary
found view
Yet her parasite for unwanted
new
I always love the way you gave
me a reason to receive comfort
But I will always hate the way
you deceived me into uncertainty
You suited a sponge
You sucked my condolence
You almost lead me to depression
You made me befit silence
Thankfully you never conceived
me to violence
It’s okay though
You enabled me to see a side
of myself I thought I’d never discern
But nevertheless caused me for concern
I refuse to remain quiet with you
I want to deny knowing your name
I will disallow myself to let you have
a hold on me myself and I
If I make this decision
Then this is goodbye
Sincerely,
Giana
© Copyright Giana Deronvil
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